Light Rail Diaries
Ok, so I got off today on time around 4 pm. The short walk to the freedom was a welcome stroll until….the cold chill of Jack Frost gave me a quick 1, 2 to the jaw when I opened the office door. ”This weather is NOT the business,” is what I muttered as I struggled to make it outside.
As I began my walk to the train station I noticed something. Winter is in full effect! Anybody that knows me knows that I’m a man that loves the warmth of summer. Winter chills and hot, heavy clothes rank real low on my “favorites” list.
Today on the train, I saw several people that could make arguments for either case of loving or hating winter time. They all made compelling “arguments.” One individual even decided to play in the middle of the road.
First, there was this couple that sat beside me on our two seater bench seat. These two were all cuddled up generating body heat like they were an electric heater. Wait…what? ”C’mon bro. I know it’s chilly, but y’all don’t need to be cramping me over here by the window because y’all wanna make a human s’more.” My facial expression must’ve given away how I was feeling, because they put their love session on pause and moved to another seat.
The second instance of our wintertime argument came right before I got off the train. There was a gentleman sitting close to the door. He was bundled up as if it were 40 degrees outside. A little overdone, but I could feel his pain.
In his hand was a brown bag with what looked like a 40 ounce “beverage” enclosed. From time to time he would take a sip. Whenever the doors opened, allowing winter’s cold chill to invade our space, he would take a deep gulp. As I walked passed him, I asked…”rough day?” He responded with…”bro, you don’t know the half.”
I gave him a customary head nod to acknowledge his discomfort. As I got off the train to head home, I told him to “take it easy” while he responded with “keep it warm.” We both smiled as I left, and he took another gulp of his cold remedy.
Now, I’ve given you an example of folk who seemed to enjoy the cold weather. Then I showed you how others, like myself, think it’s not their favorite time of year. I would be remiss if I didn’t tell you about the gentleman I saw board the train who seemed to teeter on both sides of the spectrum. This guy, who we’ll call Joe, boarded the train shortly after the smores couple vacated my seat. He proceeded to stroll to the rear of the train and sat directly behind me.
Now Joe seemed a bit confused to me. He wore one of those knit caps with the little poofy ball on the top. He also sported a full beard to keep his face warm. Saying that his beard was full would be an understatement. The length of it would surely allow him to be a full fledged member of the Duck Dynasty family. He would make Si a proud man.
Here is where it got a little weird. My man was dressed from the neck up like it was fully winter time. From the neck down…not so much. Home boy was rockin’ the short sleeved shirt. Not too “out there,” because I’ve seen people rockin’ the short or sleeveless look in cold weather quite often. It’s when I noticed that ole boy was rockin cargo shorts that I began to think something was up.
When he sat down, things became a tad bit clearer to me as to why Joe was dressed down so much. He wreaked of a liquor cabinet. So, no matter how cold it was outside…good ole Joe could probably melt ice with the mere touch of his index finger.
I turned around to give my newfound riding buddy a gander while he did his best acapella version of Rihanna’s “We Found Love.” To my surprise…initially, he wasn’t there. Wait…am I trippin’, or is this guy….? Sweet Jesus. Joe has only half a beard.
Yup. That’s right. Joe was fully intoxicated, fully clothed in shorts and a short sleeved shirt (in 50 degree weather)….all while having half of his face shaved. Made for a great laugh and some interesting memories.
So, I guess Joe just proved to me that you can, indeed, have youR cake and eat it too.